Fuck Humanity

31 Mar

I like my life.  Usually I feel pretty fulfilled and interested.  Sometimes I’m irritable, or lonely, or lazy, or annoyed, but I’m usually pretty positive about life on this planet, and that I’m doing enough good things.

But today I feel that all of my security and confidence and happiness is just so much shit in the wind, because humanity is fucking awful.  I know I usually like to present positivity and talk about how people are people and we should all be excellent to one another, but today I don’t feel like that.

I feel like people are just nasty, selfish, grasping monsters.  We bitch and we fight and we snipe and we hate and we kill.  And those of us that aren’t hating and killing and destroying happily live in our own bubble and let it happen to others.

I saw this picture today, on my lunchtime read of the news.  I was okay with it, until I read the story behind it.

And it made me really fucking angry.

This four year old girl, a Syrian refugee, is afraid that the photographer has a weapon pointed at her.  She has her hands up in surrender, and she is waiting to see if she will be killed.

How fucked up is this world?  How full of evil and despicable people is it when tiny children know what it is like to be threatened by guns?  When their mothers and fathers and siblings have desperately taught them to show that they are surrendering, in the strained hope that they might not be shot dead?

Suddenly, I’m on a downhill rush, remembering that in Nigeria there are hundreds of children missing, stolen by lunatic rebels Boko Haram, and that this is just the latest in a series of kidnappings and that these are the same monsters who sent a child into a village with a bomb strapped to her body, and that the evil fuckers will do this again and again.

In India, rapists and murderers are supported by judges and ministers blaming the victim for the crime, even going so far as to ban a documentary into the rape and murder of Jyoti Singh which horrified the country in 2012.

In Bangladesh writers have been hacked to death in the street by religious extremists who don’t want atheists to have a voice.

In Mexico hundreds of people are “disappeared” in conflicts between cartels and government forces to keep people in fear lest they threaten the profits of the drugs trade.

In Gaza ordinary people are caught between Palestinian militants and the Israeli military – in 2014 more Palestinians were killed by Israeli government forces than in any other year since the occupation of the West Bank began in 1967.

There are civil wars going on in the Central African Republic, South Sudan, Syria, and fighting between government forces and rebels and/or extremists in over 60 countries, some on the brink of wider conflict.  Those fighting use rape as a weapon, indoctrinate the kidnapped and train stolen or orphaned children to be soldiers who will go on to commit horrific acts of violence themselves.  There’s no honour in these wars, many of them are the result of the arbitrary slicing of territories that took place in the European land grabs, the dispossession of land by “civilised” colonial forces, the implementation of racial hierarchies by the “enlightened” viceroys or governors.  Seeds planted in the profit-led annexation of other people’s homes that have now grown into ever evolving tribal, racial and religious hatred.  Except in places like Australia, where genocide was practiced openly.

And in the UK, the rational, secular, enlightened emblematic nation of nations,  we are still waiting for the punchline to the sick joke that our own government and police may have played a part in covering up systemic sexual abuse of children and perhaps even the murders of rent boys, whilst our politicians simper and sing about British fucking values.  Meanwhile, the statistic of two women a week murdered by a partner or former partner holds steady, and over 13 million people (one fifth of our population) live below the poverty line.

This is just a little slice, a list conjured in my momentary break down.  I can’t even begin to list the hurt we are doing to each other in destroying homes, habitats, the global environment – in sweatshops, mines, brothels, factories – in violence and murder and hatred and distrust – worldwide!  All of it justified by a god or a prophet or a book or money or power or just fucking because.

Our species is a waste of fucking atoms, a violent, twisted sick joke of consciousness.  I want to go back to safely mocking extremists, ’cause ya know, if we can still laugh, then we win!  But I can’t.  I look at the face of that terrified little girl, who should never have needed to know this fear, and I can’t laugh, because I’ll fucking choke.  I can’t pretend its okay that sometimes people do bad things because humans create art and music, and give great hugs and buy the Big Issue sometimes, or drop coins in a charity box.  Humanity is fucking awful, despicable, abhorrent.  Not only those that commit the atrocities, but those of us that let them.

People are people, and I can’t stand it anymore.

I don’t know what I can do.

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One Response to “Fuck Humanity”

  1. Lisa B March 31, 2015 at 9:44 pm #

    You speak the absolute truth Ki. Every single word. I can’t possibly even add to that or comment further except that you struck every chord. It’s just all too much and the worst thing as you said is we don’t know what to do! 😦 Xx

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